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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010



I sure have a lot to say about hair.     First of all I'm sitting here with my hair wadded up in back - full of rats just like when i was a kid.   The only thing missing is jam in it.   I don't quite understand why it's always so ratty.   I suppose if i brushed it once in a while it might not be this way.    But to heck with that.. I just don't feel like it.   I'm too busy.  

And besides.... I've been given so much grief about my hair over the years that i  had and still have.. recurring fantasies about how wonderful it would feel to take the scissors to it and hack it off without the use of a mirror.    Just whack whack whack until all that was left was a few sprigs.     

As I told you before i used to have fantasies of putting an ax through my phone.  After soo much phone grief and too many of those particular phone fantasies I snapped one day and did it.   

Same thing with the hair.   At a later time I'll tell you what lead up to it., but for now I'll just get to the point.   

I had been somewhat married - somewhat meaning it should have been annulled by God before we ever started talking about it.      Lightening should have struck our feet as we trudged up the hill to the court house.   Anyway.....

My hair was long as usual and I thought it needed a trim.   As I was brushing it I mused to myself  "I need to cut my hair."    Over heard by the man,.  he pipes up.
"I like girls with LONG hair."   

That was my cue.   "You like girls with LONG hair huh?"  I got the scissors and started hacking away.   No mirror.   Right up to my ears I cut.   It was great.   For awhile.   Until I DID look in the mirror.    I tried for days to even it up and make it look decent but I had really done a number on my head.   I went to a beauty parlor and they also tried to do something with it.    but there were hack lines all through it.   They did the best they could and I gotta say. .  I looked like a clown for the longest time.   I do have a picture of me then.,but I can't find it .  I'll keep looking.   I had to go to my daughters wedding looking that way., so it is well documented.     

My daughter inherited these tendencies.    She had a boyfreind who also told her he liked girls with long hair.     She SHAVED  her head.   She had gorgeous long auburn hair.   but off it went.   She wore a scarf on her head for a very long time after that.   She said people thought she was going through chemotherapy.
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maggiebean
Posts
Joined: Jul 2010
You are my hero! Stubborn Girls/Women Rule! My husband knows and has known from the start that the minute he tells me to do something I'll just go and do the opposite. heehee.

You brought this topic up and this morning while doing my hair I thought about my hair over the years.

Until I was 15 my hair was below my waist and actually past my knees.

At 15 my only wish was to cut it. The men went fishin' and I went to the local salon. It went from there to the middle of my back and boy howdy that felt good!

At twenty my hair went into a bob and from my twenties to my thirties it's fluctuated between mid back, bob, and uber short.

Now I'm in my 40's and growing it out from a spikey do. It's shoulder length and as I was day dreaming about all the life changes that came along with hairdo's I wondered what life changes and hairdo's would come my way between my 40's-60's.

Thanks for sharing your story and I can't wait to see the pics.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
Well I must say writing these things down is making me think about who I am.   I've always thought of myself as the sweetest little mild mannered soft hearted country girl.   I don't eat animals because i love them.   But man,  ax this.  hack this.   Who am I??    One time I cleared a kitchen table with a baseball bat.    One time I ... oh dear... I axed somebody elses birthday cake.   He wasn't home.   But when he got home he found his chocolate birthday cake out in the woodshed with an ax through it.     Holy crap.   maybe I'm dangerous and I don't even know it.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
Well...... some other woman had made it for him.   I was jealous.
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maggiebean
Posts
Joined: Jul 2010
You make me laugh. In a good sorta way. Sometimes jealousy does get the better of us. As i've grown older, i've become milder. In my 20's there was a female who made no bones about being after my man..that's what she called him "my man"..um no dear he's my husband. She called him, came over looking for him and outright told me what her intentions were. I was young and fiesty and a new mom.

I'm also a whole slew of ethnicities that are notorious for having bad tempers. My hair has a tinge of red, it's curly and well I take after my daddy and my momma both.

I made it clear to her that she wasn't to call my house or darken my doorstep. She should have heeded that warning.

But

She didn't. Instead she came to my house while I was in the midst of doing yard work. As in I was weed wacking the yard. DH's friend was inside with the baby and let her out through the house. He had no clue who this woman was and directed her to me. Well, my wick went from long to short in a matter of like a second..I verbally went off and chased her to her car weed wacker in hand and pointed at her scabby face.

Now, looking back not really sure that was a good idea..i mean i could have gone to jail..cuz if i coulda caught her i sure would made contact.

My motto is crazy is good in moderation.

You Clemintine haven't made contact so you are well within the moderation zone.
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Kazadoodle
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
I'm not a long hair person.  In fact, I don't get what the fascination is with long hair.  When I see little girls and women in the streets and in the malls with their long hair all loose, I want to rush up and put a pony tail holder in it, or braid it, or clip it with a barrette or least have a hair band holding it back or something.   I guess I just don't like 'undressed' long hair.  That's probably  a throw back to my childhood.

I regularly hack my own hair these days.  I put it up in a pony tail right at the tippy top of my head, twist and cut, then I twist it the other way and cut again.  It's all salt and pepper grey too as I don't want to color it.  The reason I don't want to color is because if I do it once, I'm going to have to do it again when it starts growing out.  Far too much hassle for me.

I'm a fiery person as well.  I've grown milder in my 'maturity', but sometimes it gets the better of me.  I haven't made contact yet either, but  I did become a stalker once, sigh.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
Oh that makes me laugh.    you became a stalker once.   I've mightily resisted being a stalker.   but oh how I've wanted to at times.     Actually what I've wanted to do is have the money to buy a giant bill board sign on a busy highway with so and so's picture on it saying:  LADIES.   BEWARE OF THIS MAN.     I've also wanted to make a whole bunch of smaller signs and put them up and down the road of where a guy lived.. with his name.. and words like  cheater.  liar.  jerk.  ass hole.  
    Yes MaggieBean it was a good thing you didn't get her with the weed whacker.   Too bad though.    How fun it might have been to have her backed up against her car with the weed wacker whirling.  Kinda like a gun slinger in an old western movie.   You could have said  "DANCE!"   and maybe she would have done a little tap dance for you.   I've made contact a couple times.    But not because I wanted to.   I was driven to it.  reached the end of my rope.
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I feel so mainstream in comparison! My hair just reaches my waist, and won't grow any longer. I actually like it that way. I do wear it in a tail or a braid, but still, it's my HAIR and I like it being there!
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
Oh I have a good story.,   at least it's something I'm pretty proud of.    For years upon years I made a point NOT to date anyone in this valley or the next or the next.    The few times I did I was sorry.  I don't like anyone too close to where I reside ..I don't want it conveniant for them to bop in anytime and disturb my peace.    
    Well there was this younger guy who was kind of handsome actually., a big logger dude and I noticed he was riding his Harley Davison past my house often.    One time I was out in my yard and he got brave enough to stop and say hi.   We talked.  He asked me out on a date.   I said no.   I explained that I don't date local guys.   He was persistant.  He talked me into it by telling me it would be one harmless date.   We'd go to dinner in McCall.  He'd bring me home.  blabbity blab.    I thought a dinner out might be ok.    FOOD.  yummy.  me want food.   So I said yes then.   And furthermore I saw it as a really good reason to dress up and look nice for a change.   I put on a short skirt and I was lookin like a hottie while I waited for him to arrive at 7p.m. on the day he said.    I waited.   I waited.   At 9 p.m I was pissed.   HE had talked me into it and HE  f-ing stood me up!    I knew where he lived and i drove over there.   What an Idiot he was!   His drapes were open and there he was sitting on the couch with a woman.   I did not care about the woman and him.  I only cared that he stood me up.    So I parked my car,  marched across his yard,  and barged in through his unlocked front door.    I stood in the living room while they were both speechless and I read him the riot act.    I pointed my finger at him and told him YOU ARE RUDE!!!!   YOU asked me out!   I didn't even want to go out with you!   But you talked me into it!   And then you didn't show up!   THAT'S *RUDE*!!!      That poor girl he was with looked very frightened.,  but I had nothing against her at all.  
    Weeks went by and one day i got a knock on my door and there she was.    She said it took her a while but she had tracked me down and she just wanted to tell me she admired me for what I did that night.   And  no matter how he tried to tell her that I was just a crazy lady that he never really asked out.. she knew it was me who was telling the truth because she said I was dressed up.   and she knew I didn't get dressed up for nothing.   ha ha that was one of my finest moments where I actually stood up for myself.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
P.S.   the girl he had been with was his girlfreind who lived in another town.   She apparently had showed up unexpectedly and the poor fella got himself stuck in a hard spot.    Well for his own good he should have found a way to call me and say something had come up and he wouldn't be able to make it.
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Kazadoodle
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
P.S.   the girl he had been with was his girlfreind who lived in another town.   She apparently had showed up unexpectedly and the poor fella got himself stuck in a hard spot.    Well for his own good he should have found a way to call me and say something had come up and he wouldn't be able to make it.


Ah, but maybe you just didn't answer your phone?  Hmm?  

Love the story though.
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maggiebean
Posts
Joined: Jul 2010
Karin, you have me cracking up too..a stalker..lol..and you cut your own hair. I'm so clumsy that I'd probably trip fall into the mirror and take our an eye.

Clementine, you know as long as you were pushed to it, and had to defend yourself your still good ;) ;) Also I think it's awesome that you stood up for yourself and double the bonus points on that one because he got found out!! Men can be such PITA's sometimes.

As I've grown older I now realize that no man is ever worth the hassle. Never have been one who has tried to impress them though..but I'm happy to still be married to the Giant cuz he really is a good guy. Plus he's one of those dopey men who has no idea when a woman is flirting with him. Seriously, you'd have to hit him over the head with a naked woman before he'd get the hint. And I like it that way. So maybe he was worth the weed wacker moment after all. haha

A friend just posted this and I totally thought of you..

‎"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!” ~~Dr Seuss
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LauraPM
Posts
Joined: Jul 2010
I'm lovin the stories here! MaggieBean- especially like the Dr. Seus quote!
I've kept my hair relatively short for decades. The last few years I mostly cut it myself. The guy that cut my hair forever (20+ years) left to go work in a bank, and for awhile he would come to my house to cut it, but that didn't last long. It just seemed like too much of a hastle. I don't know why though. So I went to Supercuts off and on, but eventually decided I could do at least as good as them, and not only would I not have to pay for it, but if I didn't like it, I would only have myself to blame. No being upset at someone else. So it usually takes me one good cut and a couple of minor evenings up to get it right, but it's a lot easier. And I can do it anytime I want, no apt needed, lol.  The longer I do it, the easier it gets.
I have nothing else to ad, no jelous BF or GF stories, no hacked up cakes even. Well, there was that light cord that got cut in the motel room now that I think about it, but that was just the ex being downright mean! Long before she was my ex. I spilled my guts enough last time so Im not going there. Plus it's not a good story anyway.
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maggiebean
Posts
Joined: Jul 2010
Oh No Miss Laura..you gotta dish now. I gotta hear about cutting the cord..it's so metaphorical. What did she do to make you cut the lamp cord in the hotel room. Poor little lamp probably was just sitting there quietly observing the goings on trying to stay out of it..thenSnip!

Don't you all just look back at the situations you've found yourself in and shake your heads with dismay but lol at the same time. I know I do. It's comical, and sad all at the same time..in a :what were you thinking kinda way. :
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Kazadoodle
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010


Don't you all just look back at the situations you've found yourself in and shake your heads with dismay but lol at the same time. I know I do. It's comical, and sad all at the same time..in a :what were you thinking kinda way. :)


Absolutely!  You always think that you are this one kind of person, then when push comes to shove, you find that you are a completely different person.
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justpattyanne
1059 Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
I have those knee-jerk thoughts - moments of rebellious urges to do something just because of what HE said... whoever HE was at the time and for whatever reason I didn't like.

BUT, I don't want to give the HE in my life that much power. I have long hair because I like having long hair (today) - not because he does or doesn't like it.
      
"Do or Do not.
There is no try."
~Yoda~

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justpattyanne
1059 Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
The only time I have lopped my hair off in one fail swoop was when a friend's cancer came back... with everything she was facing ahead, it was losing her hair again that first made her cry. My hair was at my hips at the time. I had a couple of shots of tequila, went to see my hair dresser and had her saw off my ponytail to donate to locks for love.

As for the knee-jerk reactions over men, I try hard to not give in to them. I don't want to give him that much power over me... either by giving in when I don't want to or by doing things to spite him.  It's an ongoing battle, I'll admit.
My hair is long because I like it being long - today.
      
"Do or Do not.
There is no try."
~Yoda~

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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
How wonderful that you sawed off your ponytail to give to locks for  love.   That was a very sweet contribution.
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LauraPM
Posts
Joined: Jul 2010
I just got out of the shower after cutting my hair, lol! Yes, it is almost 4am but my scissors work whenever.  Now I just have to wait a couple of days so I can color it. My scalp fairs better if it's not squeeky clean.
PA I think that is great giving your hair to Locks of Love! So many women get cancer these days, it's really scary.  A good friend of our went through that last year. Chemo, surgery, and radiation. She had both breasts removed because the type of cancer she had  doesn't go away if it comes back again. I don't know how she kept her spirits up so well through it, but she did.  After surgery, mind you double mastectomy including some lymph nodes on one side, she tells her Dr. she wants to go home. That afternoon, same day as the surgery. Luckily her wife is an RN so her let her go. Crazy! LOL, but that's Tori. She is a very strong woman!
3-4 months before her's was detected her sister finished treatment for breast cancer and not too many months before that their mom died of breast cancer. And it wasn't genetics because Tori was adopted.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
Hey  you're inspiring me to cut my straw!   it's as long as you see here in the avaTar.   I want to whack half of it off.   In 2002 i was diagnosed with breast cancer.    Boy was that ever a shock.   I didn't see it coming at all.   I had my first mammogram and bingo!  my lucky day.
Getting news like that sort of buckled my knees.   All of a sudden i had to deal with it.   I didn't want to that's for sure.   but i decided to meet it head on.   I studied the situation.  read a bunch about it so i could understand what i was up against and my treatment options.,  I wanted to make my own decisions and not let a doctor decide what was best for me.    A biopsy revealed an aggressive variety but it had been discovered early.    I opted for a lumpectomy and radiation.    I was very dissappointed when I was told the first surgery didn't get it all and had to go in a month later for another.     7 weeks of radiation then.    It took a year out of my life to do all that.   I just trudged through it., plodding along. putting one foot in front of the other.    I had to leave home because i live in the boonies.   That was the hardest part.   To be alone in a different town in a bare apartment.   My sister provided me with the apartment and a canvas cot to sleep on and she brought me food from her garden every couple days.   I decided to treat myself to antidepressants.     Anyway.. there was a GOOD thing about it.    My mother knew she couldn't suck off me during that time so I was mother free for a whole year.   And another thing that was pretty nice too.    When i went in for the first surgery i noticed they use some awesome drugs.   The nurse called one the "I don't care drug".    And that's exactly what it did.   I was so relaxed they could have cut my arm off in front of me.    And when they were wheeling me out of the surgery room and down the hall i remember saying  "I should get cancer more often."    Which by the way is what happened .. like i said a month later I was getting wheeled back in to the surgery room.    I mention the drugs because i'm pretty much a granola bar of a person.   I don't drink, smoke or chew.  no drugs.   But i sure appreciate being out of pain and when I'm on my death bed I'm going to order it all up.  
"Bring on the drugs!! "
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justpattyanne
1059 Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
This week-end there is a "Boo Run" in our tiny town of 2200.  We will grow by over 30,000 motorcycles coming to raise money for child burn victims and burn camp. There will be a "Locks for Love" booth there with hairdressers donating their time for this great cause.

In light of this being "Breast Cancer Awareness Month" -
I'd love to see us bring a positive, strength, life affirming message of our own to the forum...
It's wonderful you sharing your stories here...
We all know how important early detection is...
We've all been touched by it...

Maybe a challenge - or posting LO's - or ???   --- Any thoughts?
Something positive, Something to get women to take charge of their own health & care, Something to get women to do the few minutes a month for a self exam.
--- Any thoughts?

Have you seen http://www.thescarproject.org/home.html"The Scar Project"?
Do not click the link if you are bothered by photos of real women who have had mastectomies.
I found it tragically powerfully beautiful.

We are not our breasts, We are more.
We are not our hair, We are more.
We are not this skin, We are more.
We are strong, we are beautiful and we are more.
      
"Do or Do not.
There is no try."
~Yoda~

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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
I was in a room with a woman doctor a few years ago whining about how my right breast was always my best breast and how it now had a stupid long  scar on it and she said "here maybe this will make you feel better"  and she lifted up her shirt to show me her scarred breast.,  which was actually no breast at all but a scar on her chest where her breast used to be.     I shut up real fast,.  just happy to still have something to plop into a bra.
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LauraPM
Posts
Joined: Jul 2010
Very sobering.
Thank you PA for the link to the scar project.  It is painful and inspiring at the same time.  I really like your idea of a challenge.
Maybe do a piece about breast cancer or breast cancer awareness, with some possible (optional) starting points, like use the color pink, use the poem you mentioned "We are not...etc" or 1 in 3, or???
I'm not good at deciding parameters, but I love the idea.
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pankerbelle
Posts
Joined: May 2010
I'm not a long hair person.  In fact, I don't get what the fascination is with long hair.  When I see little girls and women in the streets and in the malls with their long hair all loose, I want to rush up and put a pony tail holder in it, or braid it, or clip it with a barrette or least have a hair band holding it back or something.   I guess I just don't like 'undressed' long hair.  That's probably  a throw back to my childhood.

I regularly hack my own hair these days.  I put it up in a pony tail right at the tippy top of my head, twist and cut, then I twist it the other way and cut again.  It's all salt and pepper grey too as I don't want to color it.  The reason I don't want to color is because if I do it once, I'm going to have to do it again when it starts growing out.  Far too much hassle for me.

I'm a fiery person as well.  I've grown milder in my 'maturity', but sometimes it gets the better of me.  I haven't made contact yet either, but  I did become a stalker once, sigh.



Some call it stalking... I call it love lol
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
I had my first hair cut when I was 13.   My hair was so long I had to keep it braided at night just so I wouldn't get tangled up in it.   I had to move it out of the way to sit down.   I always had a headache because my mom would put it in a pony tail which pulled on my poor head.    So I begged her to cut it.   In a couple years it was back to being way long again.    And pretty much it's been long all my life.   I'm lazy I guess.   Can't figure out any other way to have it.  

      I was born with straight hair.   A horrible curse according to my mother who thought the prettiest girls kept their hair curled and teased up like a damn poodle dog after the parlor.  
When I was little she had control of my head.   And she wrapped rags in my hair and I slept with these little rag finger curls all the time., so that the next day voila!  my disgusting straight hair would have curls like little Shirley Temple.   

     When I became a teenager my mother lost control of my hair.   That is when the unrelenting life long criticism of my hair began.   My hair needed to be CUT.   And it needed to be CURLED.   "You need to curl that hair of yours"   she'd say.   "It looks like shit."    "It looks like straw."    "You'll never get a man with hair like that."   

      On and on and on it went.  Year after year.  Non stop.  I'm not joking.    I heard it all a thousand times.  I grew up.   I became an adult.   and still she wouldn't let up on the issue.   I wonder why she kept it up.   After a few hundred times wouldn't she maybe get a clue that I was the way I was and no cajoling from her was going to change me?     Did she think I was so stupid that maybe I simply hadn't heard her all those other times?

     She tried every angle.   MOstly it was just plain criticism.   But once in a while she tried a nice approach.   "Look at her"   she'd point to some woman with short curly hair  "You'd look so good with a hairdo like that.   Wouldn't you like to look good for once?"   

    And then there was the other kind of pointing out.   I can't even count the times (hundreds I'm sure) that my mom would point to some women with Long, Straight hair like mine either on the street or even on television., and she'd say  "Look at that bitch.   Does she think she looks good with straight hair like that?.... NO one looks good with hair like that!"  

      And what?   am I supposed to be so dim witted that I don't understand that the message is to ME when she says that?!    It wasn't just the hair.   The fact that I didn't wear makeup went hand in hand with the hair business.    I was a loser.   A wash out.   All because I wasn't the high falootin flashy made up curly haired daughter who she could be proud of.    Tell you the truth though.   HAD I been all that... she would have hated me all the more.   I stayed low just for her.   I let her think what she wanted about me because I learned early that mama would NOT be happy if I was happier or prettier or more successful then she was.   

      About 6 years ago I felt all lovey towards my mom and thought I would give her a nice surprise.   I blew 200 dollars on a wig.   It looked just like Sharon Ozborns hair.  wife of Ozzie Ozborn.   It was even a dark reddish color.    Before I got to moms house I really slathered the make up on my face too.    Heavy on the eye paint and heavy on the rouge ,. just the way mom would like it.   

     She kind of did a double take when she saw me but regained her composure very quickly.   Her first and only words about it??    "Is that a wig?   It's the wrong color!!"  she said in a rather pissy way.    Well so much for THAT.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010


Me and my horse LillyBelle in Boise Idaho.   Oh ya.,  and the straw hanging off my head.    I was 17.   And everything I was wearing belonged to my brother Troy.  At 5'8" I was too tall according to my little 5'2" mother.    I stooped and bent trying to be shorter.   I was too dumb and too homely to ever amount to anything so this year I quit high school and fled to my beloved mountains where I've been ever since.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
My mom could NOT be trusted in public.   For one thing., she had a foul mouth that rivaled ANY man on the planet.    But mostly she just said rude things without thinking.    Like she had this thing against women with dark hair because one time when she was gone for a few days or a week or whatever on a little trip with a boyfreind the authorities came and took my sister Helen away from Grandma who could not speak English., and they put Helen in an orphanage.    My mom found out and went there,. hid in the bushes and got my sisters attention when the kids were out playing and she grabbed Helen and sprung her from the clinker so to speak.    But she had to go to court and the case worker who had dark hair whispered to my mom that she would GET my sister away from her.     So....
  
Mom would NOT go through lines in a grocery store where the checker had dark hair.    And... she would loudly proclaim why.    Like anyone cared.   Like it made any sense at all.  Like THIS checker in this grocery store must be wicked like that wicked case worker was way back then.    So she'd wait in a longer line

One time we were having lunch in the Boise Airport right before I was leaving to go be traumatized by a man in Salt Lake City Utah.    So we're sitting at a table when a man and woman walk by us.   The woman was only two steps away when mom speaks up in a loud,incredulous voice and asks   "Is that that womans HAIR!??   or is that a goddamn WIG!??"
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Fifi
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
Forget homely...the things our mothers sometimes do or say to us, well...anyway that's a wonderful picture, my hair was never that long, but close, and it has a natural wave, at school one of my teaching buddies dubbed me "The Wave!"   Oh, loved the little story about the "bad girls", glad you like those pinups, they can be such fun!  one more thing, how come there wasn't a cowboy in the kit, those are hard to come by domaine free!  Toodaloo or something like that (great avie too, don't think I have the nerve!
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
I guess there's no cowboys because I became impatient with this kit.    Didn't do me any good to be in a hurry because I made so many mistakes I had to reupload over and over again until finally i just said no more.  that's it.   Tim and Lorie told me to add Day as a cowboy because I had him in many poses.   But I didn't think he would like being a pin up cowboy.   I do notice the shortage of men.   I have a few men from the 30's and 40's and will soon put them out.  haven't decided if they'll have their own kit or be in with some girlies.
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Clementine
Posts
Joined: Apr 2010
One time my sister Julie had a make over team come to her hair shop.    My mom went.   I went.   It was a fun day together.   ha ha... we were bonding.,   And I was a good sport considering they were going to work me over and turn me into something I was not.
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